by Sandy Joyce
For anyone who's been living a healthy lifestyle for some time, I'm sure it's no secret that our surroundings are not, shall we say, supportive.
Let's face it, if we were to succumb to the ways of convenience, we'd all be 300 pounds with overcrowded villages of cellulite. But despite the challenges we face from our surroundings, I strongly believe that we're our own worst enemy.
That's right. I'm saying that you're the biggest thing in the way of your success!
Forget about the tempting, convenient Burger Hut down the street. Forget about the fancy "indulge yourself" slogans. Forget about the pressures you face from your so-called friends and family to just "have a little."
"C'mon, it's just one teeny-weeny, little cupcake."
We can't change the world. The only thing, the only person we ultimately control is ourselves.
The truth is, every day we're faced with several choices, whether we know it or not. Even getting out of bed is a choice. You say, "No it isn't, I'd get fired!" Yes, most of us probably would — and that's why we choose to get up and go to work!
Living a lean, healthy lifestyle is like that. It's full of choices. You don't have to go to the gym. You don't have to eat right. Nobody is making you. Sure, there are benefits if you do. And, of course, there are consequences if you don't. But, it's your choice.
Every day, every squat, every chin-up, every meal — you choose it. Boy that sounds like a lot of responsibility. And you know what? It is!
For those of you who are successful, bravo! It's probably become so automatic that you don't even have to think about it (kind of like getting up for work).
For those of you who still struggle, read on. I'm going to show you some of the common mistakes you're making, and give you some rules to follow to ensure that you get out of your own way and achieve the body of your dreams!
It's a shame to see so many people take for granted how much liberty we have in controlling our health and wellbeing. Seriously, think about it. We live in a free country (generally speaking!). No one force feeds us. No one restrains us. We ultimately control all aspects and how we use or misuse, our freedom and luxuries.
That being said, the worst thing people can do is play the blame game. When people shift the blame elsewhere, they're basically rejecting their responsibility to take care of and control themselves.
Those people struggle with their weight their entire lives. Why? Because they don't have a problem! In their eyes, I mean. It's everyone else that has the problem. It's everyone else's fault. Burger Hut shouldn't be there. French fries shouldn't taste so yummy. Co-workers shouldn't bring cookies in. And my all-time favorite, "I have my mother's ass. Thanks a lot, mom!"
These blame-game victims always struggle because they've never owned the responsibility they have in their weight problem, and therefore they can't change the outcome. And that's sad because it's an absolute powerless place to be.
I can't even stress how big of a mistake it is to neglect your nutrition. Most people put so much thought and effort into their workouts, and that's great, but what about the other 23 hours in the day?
Not only is watching what you eat and eating the right ratios of macronutrients important in losing fat and having energy, but what about muscle building and recovery?
If you're training regularly, that means your body's in a constant state of recovery. Do you know what that means? It means your body is in constant need of replenishment, refueling, and healing.
If you don't eat properly for this process, you won't recover. And if you don't recover, you don't train up to your should-be-growing potential in subsequent workouts. If you don't get what I'm saying, I'm saying that winging your nutrition could lead to very little, if any, progress.
If you want to be successful, don't wing your nutrition. Plan it!
Jamie didn't build her body by accident.
Many people feel bad saying no to others when they're asked to do something they really don't want (or have time) to do. They take on too many responsibilities, and before they know it, their calendar is full of things they have to do for other people, leaving little or no time for themselves.
Good for your friends; bad for you.
Most women I've worked with who've struggled with their weight for years fit this description. I have a client now who's always doing, going, and sacrificing for someone. I swear she has 40 hours in her day!
While she's a great person, someone I've grown very close to, her crazy schedule has taken an unwelcomed toll on her body. Not only is she overweight, but she's also unhappy with herself and her health.
Am I telling you to be more selfish? Yes! Well, sort of.
If you know this is you; if you find yourself always running around doing things for other people, feeling short changed, and that you're never good enough, then yes, you could afford to be a little more selfish. If you don't, pretty soon you'll find yourself trapped inside a body you don't want, or recognize.
Everyone knows that when you want a positive outcome, you focus on the positives. That's true whether you're training a dog, raising a child, or obtaining a goal.
So, why do we treat ourselves any differently? Why do we focus on what we can't do and what we fear we'll never accomplish, instead of focusing on what we can do, and what we've already accomplished?
That negative outlook and self-dialogue is absolute poison. One of the things I look for in clients is their reactions to trying new stuff. I've noticed their attitude has a lot to do with how well they do at the given task.
If I hear, "Are you crazy, I can't do that!" Or, "That's too heavy!" I always respond with, "Be careful, your body just heard you!"
Think back to the last time you made a statement like: "I'm too fat," "I don't think I'll ever reach my goal," "I can't do it," "Maybe if I was ten years younger," or "I wonder how long I'm going to last this time."
Ladies, talk about a downer! Imagine how much of a negative influence you have on yourself if this is what's going through your mind. Yikes. No wonder you can't do a chin up. No wonder you haven't lost the last ten pounds.
If you find yourself saying these things, be aware that they aren't helping you. You may say you're just kidding, but really, those comments are very damaging to how you act and treat yourself. You do hear those comments — trust me, your ears are very close to your mouth! And your internal dialogue does affect your actions.
Don't believe me? Try doing the opposite!
So, with society and all of its heavy-set opposition, do we really need to be the worst offender in our own success? Instead of adding to the sabotage ourselves, why don't we all try to support ourselves for a change!
The best thing you can do for yourself is to own your life and take responsibility for the road you're on. Whether you know it or not, you're in the driver's seat. You may be asleep at the wheel, but you're there. Take the keys and the steering wheel, and own it!
While there are things in this world we can't control, there are several that we can. We all have a specific genetic makeup. Everyone I've met has some part of their body they wish was at least slightly different. I certainly do. But, I don't sit at home and choose brownies over chicken because I have my mother's ass!
There will always be that opposition, and everyone has their own personal struggles, but we always have a choice. People cheat themselves when they take away that responsibility, that ownership, that power.
Don't do that.
You have to know what you're after. What's all that effort and sacrifice for? Do you want to look better? Perform better? Be more defined? Have more energy? Fit into a size six?
Know specifically what you're trying to achieve. Not having goals is like getting in your car and driving to the outskirts of nowhere. Talk about a waste of expensive gas! This is your life, body, and health we're talking about.
Pick a goal and get after it.
You know the world isn't set up to serve you chicken and veggies every few hours. It takes some thought and planning on our part to have these things available to us when we need them.
Cook up a bunch of chicken breasts on a Sunday afternoon. Pack a cooler full of shakes, bars, carrot sticks, and almonds if you know you're going to be out for a while. It really isn't that tough, but it does take some thought and effort.
Stop being so lazy.
Go ahead, try it. "No." Do it again, this time louder. "No!" Now didn't that feel great? Good, the next time a co-worker asks you to stay late for her so she can go shampoo her dog, say no!
Do you think that's selfish? Maybe. But, what's wrong with that? All I'm asking is for you to spend as much time and energy on yourself as you do on other people. That's fair, right?
Try saying statements like this:
"I'm so worth it!"
"I'm doing so well!"
"My butt looks bootylicious!"
Even if you don't fully believe it (yet), say it anyway.
Look at yourself in the mirror. Sound silly? Did you know that people with poor body image and low self-esteem can't do this very well? And did you know that effects how you treat yourself? Do it anyway. Look in that mirror every day. (Don't do it at the gym, though, like those goofballs you see always staring and grunting at themselves.)
Many great athletes, in addition to practicing their sport, do a thing called "visualization." They simply close their eyes and see themselves playing their sport. What do you think they're visualizing? Failure? Bricking a three-pointer? Missing a lift? Taking home the third place trophy?
Hell no! They visualize success! Research shows the mind can't tell the difference.
Being healthy is a choice. It's your choice. Next time you see that Burger Hut billboard, instead of being a victim, decide to be healthy.
Apply these four tips today, because if all of you is going in one positive direction, your body has no choice but to tag along!
Sandy Joyce is a personal trainer and nutrition specialist in the Boston area who specializes in helping women of all ages lose fat and maintain better health. She has a reputation for not only getting women into great shape quickly, but helping them adopt lifelong healthy habits.
For info on her online training services, visit her website at BestBodyEva.com or email her at sandy@bestbodyeva.com.
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